Reflecting on 63 years

Today is my 63^rd birthday.  Age is a strange phenomenon; in my mind I don’t feel a great deal different from what I’ve felt during much of my adult life.  My body, however, informs me that the years are rolling by.  Earlier in the week, as I was pondering on my forthcoming birthday, my mind took me back to an incident during the time when Sue and I were courting (I seem to recall that I was much keener on Sue than she was on me!)  Sue had dropped round to my house for a coffee.  I happened to be playing a Cliff Richard LP, and as I was in the kitchen making the coffee, the track “When I’m 64” began to play.

This Beatles’ song looks to the future and includes the words, “Will you still need me, will you still feed me when I'm sixty-four?”  As I walked back into the room with the coffees, Sue said in fairly loud voice, “The answer’s no!”  I didn’t immediately understand what she was talking about, until eventually I linked her statement with the song words.  So only another year to go until (God-willing) I reach the age of 64, though I’m hoping that Sue might have changed her mind by then!

I’ve been in a rather reflective mood this week, recalling memories of people and events from down the years.  Although there have been some really dark periods, I have to say that as I look back I am filled with an overwhelming sense of thanksgiving and gratitude.  I have so much to thank God for.  I could use the words which the late Ken Dodd often sang, “I thank the Lord I've been blessed with more than my share of happiness.”

I cherish my family, the friends I have made over the years, so many wonderful experiences and the privilege of ministry.  I would be lying if I said that life has always been rosy.  On occasions I have felt at my absolute wit’s end.  But from the day when, aged 5, I invited Jesus into my life, I know that he has walked with me every step of the way.  He has poured his grace and love upon me, he has been there to strengthen me in times of great weakness, he has held me when I felt lost and alone.  Everything I have I owe to him.

The words of a song by Andre Crouch express something of how I feel right now:

How can I say thanks for the things
You have done for me?
Things so undeserved yet you gave
To prove your love for me
The voices of a million angels
Could not express my gratitude
All that I am, and ever hope to be
I owe it all to thee