The power of words

I was interested to read a recent post on Twitter from well-known ‘Money-Saving Expert’ Martin Lewis.  He is a regular ‘tweeter’ but had taken a break over the Christmas holiday period to focus on his family (which is to be applauded – perhaps more of us should seriously consider whether we spend more time on social media than is healthy for our relationships with friends and family).  Anyway, this was his first tweet following the break:

Good morning. Happy New Year. Slightly nervous about re-engaging on twitter today. Having had a break, I realise how the 1 nasty tweet easily out-impacts the 1,000 nice on my psyche.

I have been pondering on why it is that somehow one careless, unkind or hurtful word can seem to have a more powerful, negative and lasting effect on a person that many kind, thoughtful and encouraging words?  Whatever the reason, it should make us take great care in the words we use.  One of the regrettable aspects of social media is that some people seem very quick to offer critical and hurtful comments towards others.  But it’s not just on social media that this occurs.  I am sure that every person has been guilty at some time of causing hurt by words which we have spoken, and sometimes that hurt can be tremendously difficult to erase.

As New Testament writer James reminds us, the tongue is a powerful instrument which can be used to destructive effect:

‘It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell’ (James 3.5-6).

He continues:

‘This is scary: You can tame a tiger, but you can’t tame a tongue - it’s never been done. The tongue runs wild, a wanton killer. With our tongues we bless God our Father; with the same tongues we curse the very men and women he made in his image. Curses and blessings out of the same mouth!’ (James 3.7-10).

If I say something hurtful or unkind to Sue, I know that it remains with her, even though I apologise and tell her how much I love her.  As we all know, once a word is out of our mouth we cannot recall it, however much we may regret saying that word.  It is not surprising that the Bible has much to say on the use of words.  For example, Proverbs 15.4 says, ‘Kind words heal and help; cutting words wound and maim’.  Peter writes, ‘Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech’ (1 Peter 3.10).  Paul is another who weighs in with his instruction, ‘Do not use harmful words, but only helpful words, the kind that build up and provide what is needed, so that what you say will do good to those who hear you’ (Ephesians 4.29).

I am far from unblemished in words which I have used to others.  There have been many times when I have greatly regretted using unkind of unthoughtful words.  But in a society where criticism and judgement of others seems to be increasing, I would suggest that it is time for all of us to do our best to keep a tight reign in our tongues.  That is no easy task, but it is surely worthwhile.

I recently came across an image which I find extremely thought-provoking: