My worst Christmas memory

So Christmas Day 2013 has come and gone.  For me, it was a hugely enjoyable day, beginning with a church service where people of all ages gathered to celebrate the birth of Jesus.  It was a time of fun and laughter; there were also serious moments as we remembered all those for whom Christmas will be a sad and difficult time.  It was a great way to start the day.

At home we had 8 members of our family for lunch, ranging in ages from Aunt Joan, who is 90, to our grandson Benjamin, who is less than 3 months old.  I so appreciate my family, and opportunities to spend precious times with them.

And to top off a great day, the Christmas episode of Doctor Who.  As I later tweeted, "What more could a man want?"

Much as I enjoy the Christmas period, and all that goes with it, each Christmas my mind goes back to what could be described as my worst Christmas memory.  It was some years ago, when after the Christmas morning service, and before I returned home to spend time with the family, I went to the local hospital to visit a young single mum who was dying of cancer.  She was a lovely lady, and full of fun despite her desperate situation.  Yet the inevitable sadness was there as she contemplated her imminent departure from this world, leaving behind her two young and much-loved children.

I spent some time with her, and prayed with her.  Even though we both knew that from an eternal perspective her future was safe and secure in God's hands, the pain and sorrow of the situation was very real.  It's impossible to imagine the feelings that young mum must have been going through.  She died a few days later.  When we held a service to celebrate her life and say goodbye, it was heart-breaking to see her two children following the coffin, knowing that their mum would not be around to witness their growth to adulthood.  Each Christmas, the memories of that Christmas day experience return.

And of course the reality is that for many people Christmas Day 2013 will have been very hard.  There will be those who mourn for loved ones no longer alive, and others who are going through particularly difficult experiences.  I was deeply saddened to read the following Christmas Day Facebook message from Canon Andrew White (aka The Vicar of Baghdad):

'It was to have been a day of great rejoicing amongst the Christians of Baghdad. Amidst such terrible recent atrocities Christmas was to be a real day of hope. As Christians left church Christmas morning there was a huge bomb, scores of Christians were killed and injured. This bomb was soon followed by another with many more deaths and casualties. This was Christmas day in Baghdad.'

So how does the message of Christmas hope fit in with all the suffering and sadness in the world today?  I am reminded of the opening words of Christina Rossetti's carol, 'Love came down at Christmas.'   

One of the names given to Jesus is 'Emmanuel', which means "God with us."  God stepped down into our broken and hurting world.  He came and lived as one of us, experiencing all that we experience.  Before Jesus returned to the Father, he gave this promise, 'I will be with you always.'  We are not promised a life free from pain or sadness, but we are promised that if we open our hearts to God, he will be with us in every situation.  As Canon Andrew White said earlier today,

'Christmas in Baghdad is burying the dead of those Christians murdered at church yesterday. Despite all the desperate desperation the Lord is still here and with us.'

All that glitters is not gold

So another series of BBC's hugely popular "Strictly Come Dancing" comes to a glittering finale, with Abbey Clancy and her professional dance partner Aljaz Skorjanec walking off with the Glitter Ball Trophy, thanks to the votes of the great British public.  On balance, I think that with Abbey's remarkable development over the course of the series she and Aljaz were probably worthy winners.  Despite the fact that neither Sue nor I have much dancing talent, we have been keen Strictly fans almost from the beginning (the show first appeared in 2004).  It provides good family entertainment.

During the course of the final show last Saturday, the four finalists (and some of the other contestants who had fallen by the wayside during the series) were interviewed about their Strictly experience.  What was particularly interesting to me was the fact that they all described their time on Strictly Come Dancing as a "life-changing experience".  With great emotion, they talked about the blessing of being part of the Strictly family, the real, deeply-felt joy which they had experienced through dance, and the lasting friendships which they had made.  A number of them stated that being part of Strictly was just about the best experience of their lives. I must admit to being quite moved at times as the contestants expressed their thoughts and feelings.  It was clear that the joy and happiness at being part of Strictly was tempered to some extent by the fact that the series, and their part in it, was coming to an end.

As I was watching the interviews and listening to what was being said, it seemed that there is an obvious parallel with the Christian life and experience.  In church last Sunday we were looking at that passage in John's gospel where Jesus says to Nicodemus, the religious leader, 'no one can see the Kingdom of God without being born again.'   What Nicodemus couldn't grasp was that Jesus was talking about a spiritual birth into a whole new life with him; literally a life-changing experience, becoming part of the family of God, knowing the loving and living presence of God as a constant and life-enhancing reality.

The gospels give many accounts of people whose lives were totally transformed when they met with Jesus.  Over that last 2000 years or so, countless lives have been changed through an encounter with him.  Jesus is still in the business of changing lives.  It sounds as though the Strictly experience is wonderful.  But the problem is that it is restricted to a few celebrities, and it only lasts some 13 weeks.  The Jesus experience is for everyone, it is far deeper and more profound in every way, and it lasts for all eternity!

'There were some shepherds in that part of the country who were spending the night in the fields, taking care of their flocks. An angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone over them. They were terribly afraid, but the angel said to them, “Don't be afraid! I am here with good news for you, which will bring great joy to all the people. This very day in David's town your Saviour was born - Christ the Lord!'  Luke 2:8-11

When things don't turn out as expected

Our granddaughter, Beth, was born in May last year.  When we were visiting her and her parents recently we were told that Beth had been chosen to play the part of an angel in the church nativity play.  Now Beth can look rather angelic, and at times she behaves in an angelic sort of way, but as with all children, it's not always the case.  She doesn't always respond to instructions, and we wondered how things would turn out.  Sadly, we were not able to be there to witness her dramatic debut, but from what we understand, things didn't quite go as expected.  This is her mum's report via Facebook:

Beth's first nativity - surprisingly allocated the roll of an angel. Not only did she miss the angel section by wandering off, later on she stole baby Jesus from his manger! 

I must admit that even though Beth's nativity play debut didn't go quite as expected, her antics have caused quite some amusement.  I believe that baby Jesus was eventually retrieved and placed back in the manger!

Many years ago there was a series of programmes on the TV with the title, "Tales of the Unexpected."   Each programme featured an ending with an unexpected twist.  In one of my sermons yesterday we were looking at how life doesn't always work out as we had hoped or expected; specifically, we looked at the life of John The Baptist.  He seemed to have everything going for him: his birth was prophesied by an angel, his conception was miraculous (his mother, Elizabeth, was thought to be barren and beyond child-bearing age); his ministry as a forerunner of the Messiah was prophesied by the Old Testament prophets, and he had a clear calling from God.  And yet, by the time he was in his early 30s he was languishing in a prison cell, having been arrested because he had upset King Herod.  In due course Herod had John beheaded.

John's death seemed to make no sense.  He had dedicated his life to serving God and to proclaiming the words which God has placed in his heart.  He had been faithful to God's calling on his life.  Jesus himself said, 'I assure you that John the Baptist is greater than anyone who has ever lived.' (Matthew 11:11).  Yet John never walked out of that prison cell alive.  There were probably times during John's imprisonment when he thought to himself, 'I never thought my life would turn out like this.'

Perhaps many people have such thoughts at times during their lives.  Ultimately we must understand what God has said through the prophet Isaiah, '"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD' (Isaiah 55:8).  Sometimes our personal hopes and expectations will not be realised.  Sometimes we will face deep disappointments, and very difficult circumstances.  At those times we are faced with a choice: either to trust in God and believe that he knows best, or to turn away from him.  On the desk in my study is a small plaque which was a gift to me.  On it are written words from the prophecy of Jeremiah, 'For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."' (Jeremiah 29:11).  I hope and pray that whatever happens in my life, even when things don't turn out as unexpected, I will hang on to that wonderful promise.

Whose way will you do it?

I recently took the funeral service of a lady who, although she was given the name Dorothy at birth, had been known all her life as Dolly.  She had lived into her 90s, and although there was a natural sadness and sense of loss at her passing, the service was focused very much on celebrating her life and the treasured memories which she leaves behind.  She was a lady of strong Christian faith, and the two hymns which we sung during the service, "The Lord's my Shepherd" and "Come, let us sing of a wonderful love"  spoke of the reality of the loving presence of God in every circumstance of life.

As the funeral party processed into the crematorium chapel, the music which had been chosen by the family was played over the p.a. system.  We heard Louis Armstrong's powerful rendering of the song, "Hello Dolly".  I suppose that some might think it a little irreverent, and I'm not sure that all the lyrics of the song exactly fitted the occasion, but it seemed to me a positive way to lift the spirits of those who were present and to put a smile on people's faces.  After all, we were there to celebrate a life well lived.

When I first began life as a Methodist minister back in 1990, hymn/music choices at funeral services, whether in church or at the crematorium, were, generally speaking, fairly traditional.  Amongst the favourite hymns at the time were "The old rugged cross" and "Abide with me".  Times have changed as the years have passed by.  No longer can it be assumed that most people will have any acquaintance with traditional hymns.   It is not uncommon for families to choose not to have any hymns at funeral services, especially if those attending are not likely to know them.  Trying to sing a hymn which few people know can be a painful experience!

The choice of accompanying music has become much more varied, sometimes with a humorous element.  I remember some years ago that a rather large gentleman was carried into the crematorium to the tune "He ain't heavy, he's my brother."  That certainly brought a smile to a few faces!

Some ministers have a fairly strict policy regarding what they will allow in terms of music etc. at funeral services.  I have always taken the view that the funeral service is primarily for the benefit of the family and other mourners, and wherever possible I have tried to go with the family's wishes.  I must admit, however, that there is one song which I don't really like to hear at a funeral service (though I don't disallow it).  It isn't because I don't quite like the song, it's just the implications which go with it.  The song?  Frank Sinatra's version of "I did it my way".

The opening words of the song are certainly appropriate for a funeral service:  "And now the end is near and so I face the final curtain."  The problem, as far as I see it, comes with the main theme of the song: "I did it my way".  The writer of the New Testament book of Hebrews states, 'people are destined to die once, and after that to face judgment' (Hebrews 9:27).   All of us will one day stand before the judgement seat of God.  I'm not sure that God will be all that impressed when we say, as we look back over our lives, "Well, God, I did it my way!"

Because God is gracious, he gives us the gift of free will. The choice is clear: we can live life in God's way, or we can choose our own way.  The choice we make will affect not only this earthly life but also our eternal destiny.  I like to listen to "Ol' Blue Eyes", but I have some reservations about the implications of singing this particular song at a funeral service!

A Nativity set with a difference

Sue and I have visited Israel/Palestine (often called 'The Holy Land') on a number of occasions, though we haven't done so for a few years.  It is a very special place, unlike any other I have visited, not least because it is the land where Jesus himself walked.  Two or three times I have led parties of pilgrims to the Holy Land.  As well as visiting many of the sites which are associated with the Bible and the ministry of Jesus, I have also made a point of giving opportunity for members of the group to meet people who live in the land, and particularly local Christian believers, both Jews and Arabs.  It is a real eye-opener to meet with those who live in the land and hear their perspective on life.

One of the places I have visited is the Bethlehem Bible College.  Their work, not only in helping students gain a greater understand of their faith but also in serving their local community, is a real inspiration.  Recent years have been difficult for the people of Bethlehem, particularly the Christian population.  There was a time when Christians were in the majority in the town, but over the years many have felt the need to leave Bethlehem and seek refuge elsewhere.  For a time tourist visitor numbers dropped when people became anxious of the situation in Israel/Palestine, although tourist numbers now seem to be on the increase again.

One of the ways in which people in Bethlehem earn a living is through selling souvenirs.  Bethlehem Bible College itself has a gift shop which helps to support their ongoing ministry.  I happened to be browsing the gift shop website recently when I noticed a nativity set which was rather unusual, certainly different from any which I had seen before.  It wasn't cheap, but I persuaded myself that by buying the nativity set I would be supporting the work of the college.  I ordered the set about a week ago, in the hope that it might arrive in time for Christmas.  Earlier this afternoon, as I was pulling into the drive after a trip out in the car, a Royal Mail delivery van arrived with a large parcel.  I couldn't think what it could be until I saw the Arabic writing on the side of the box.  I was amazed that the set had arrived so quickly, and hurriedly unpacked it to view the contents.

The nativity set now has pride of place in our front room.  What makes it different from other nativity sets is that between the stable scene (Mary, Joseph, the baby etc) and the wise men is a wall.  Poignantly, this represents the large so-called Separation Wall which currently surrounds the Bethlehem area.  Israel began building the barrier in 2002. When completed, it will be a 400-mile long network of high walls, electronic fences, gates and trenches.  It was created to separate Palestinians in the West Bank and Gaza from Israel so that they may not enter Israel without authorisation.  To some, it is a much needed security precaution; to others it is a sign of oppression and injustice.  I wanted to buy this particular nativity set, with its wall, to remind me every time I look at it of the needs of the people living in Bethlehem today.  It will ensure that my thoughts and prayers will remain with the inhabitants of the "little town of Bethlehem" who often struggle to experience the stillness and peace of which the famous carol speaks.