Two little words which can mean so much

The image on the right is of a sunset over Derwentwater in the Lake District. It was not, sadly, one which I took myself. Rather, it is the image on the front of a greetings card which I received in the post this week.

A couple of weeks ago I took a funeral service for a family, and they had taken the trouble to write to express their appreciation with a Thank You card. I do occasionally receive Thank You cards, but it is not a common occurrence. The fact that someone has taken time to sit down and write a letter or card means a lot. The two words, "Thank You" can have significant effect. To feel appreciated is something we all need!

I'm sure that I have mentioned this before in my blog, but I wonder how many of us feel thankful but fail to express that thanks. The problem is that there will probably come a time when it's too late, and the opportunity has been lost.

A few months ago I encouraged the folk in my churches to make a commitment to contact someone and tell them how much they were appreciated. I hope that they responded to the challenge. How sad if we have people around us who we really appreciate and yet we never take time to tell them! And it doesn't just have to be those we know. How about the cheerful check-out operator at the supermarket? Or the cheerie postie? Or our long-suffering wife/husband/friend? A few more expressions of appreciation will go a long way!

One of the greatest privileges a person can experience in life is to be a parent. Being a parent is also one of the most daunting responsibilities a person can face! Sue and I have been blessed to have three wonderful child who, despite our failings as parents, have turned out to be young adults of whom we are very proud.

Looking the other way through the family line, I feel very blessed, also, with the family into which I was born. Dad died in 1991. There are still moments when I feel his loss deeply. He was a quiet man, but someone who was greatly admired for his strength of character.

Mum lives in sheltered accommodation near Chesterfield. My eldest sister lives nearby, and does a great job keeping a watchful eye over Mum. Although I don't see Mum all that often, I do speak to her very regularly on the phone. I was reflecting recently that I can't think of many people I have known over the years who were so utterly content with life as my Mum. Very often during our phone calls she tells me how content she is. "My faith and my family are the what matters to me" is one of her favourite sayings. Mum is not very confident with her walking, and she doesn't get out a great deal, yet she is so very happy with life. Her strong Christian faith, and the love and support of her family, are the two key elements which give her real joy and contentment. I am sure that if it were possible to bottle a little of Mum's contentment it would sell for a fortune!

The apostle Paul wrote to his young protege Timothy, 'godliness with contentment is great gain.' In another of his letters he wrote, 'I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.' There are, no doubt, many people who have great riches in terms of what this world can offer, yet lack true contentment with life. Paul knew that true contentment doesn't really come from outward circumstances, or material possessions, but from the knowledge and experience of God's love in Christ. My Mum knows it, too.

Tempus fugit

56 years ago yesterday, I was born! My Mum has told me many times that my birth was the cause of great rejoicing in the little village where my family lived. The news soon spread, "The Clarks have got a boy!" I have four elder sisters, and I think my parents had more or less decided that it was going to be their lot in life to raise a family of girls. Perhaps they decided to have another go, one last time. I'm glad they did! (Not sure what happened when my little brother was born around six years later!)

Some people don't like birthdays, especially as the years pass. I find that birthdays give me cause for a little reflection on my life so far. It has given me the opportunity to pause and give thanks to God for the tremendous blessings he has poured into my life in so many ways. I have a fantastic family, some great friends, a job I love, and the knowledge that God loves me and has a purpose for my life. Yes, I've experienced some tough times over the years, and my life isn't always a bed of roses, but I thank God for so much. I remember from childhood an old chorus which said "count your blessings" and that's certainly what I try to do.

I can never remember a time when God wasn't a big part of my life. I was only 5 years old when I first made a conscious decision to commit my life to Jesus, and I know that there has never been a single moment since then that he has abandoned me (even during the times when I did not acknowledge his presence). But I also know that there have been many times when I have failed him, and said or done things which have hurt God and other people. There have been lots of things in my life which I have regretted. Yet I rejoice that God is a God of grace, who offers forgiveness through Jesus. And I am constantly amazed by his love and grace even for me!

As I look back with thanksgiving, so I look to the future with confidence; who knows what God has in store for me!

Thoughts on the death of Osama bin Laden

Over the past couple of days I have been reflecting on the news item which managed to knock Will and Kate off the media centre stage, namely the death of Osama bin Laden. There are a number of aspects which make me feel rather uneasy.

Firstly, President Obama's confident assertion that bin Laden's death has “made the world a safer place”. Has it really? Some experts suggest that it will only make radical Islamists even more determined to die for their cause. Does the death of bin Laden even begin to get to the root of the terrorist problem?

Another aspect which gives me unease is the admission that information on bin Laden's whereabouts was obtained by the use of what are euphemistically called “enhanced interrogation techniques”. Some would say that the word “torture” is a more realistic term. By using and approving of such techniques, are we not in danger acting in a way which we would roundly condemn in others?

When news first filtered through of bin Laden's death, there were some scenes of wild jubilation and rejoicing in the USA. Again, I must admit to feeling very uneasy at the sight of celebrating Americans. Of course, I can quite understand the fact that many Americans (and others) felt a sense of relief when a man who was apparently responsible for such terrible carnage and death could no longer instigate such acts. At the same time, I was moved to read the words of another famous American, Martin Luther King Jnr. (himself the victim of violence), "I mourn the loss of thousands of precious lives, but I will not rejoice in the death of one, not even an enemy. Returning hate for hate multiplies hate.... Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that."

I am reminded, also, of the words of St Paul in his letter to Roman Christians (themselves suffering violent persecution), 'Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.'

Perhaps I am raising more questions than answers, but then this is a very complex issue. One thing is certain, and that is that bin Laden will have to stand under the judgement of God, as will we all.

Final thought, and that is about bin Laden the human being. Probably when he was born his parents loved and cherished him, and did their best to nurture him. What was it in his life that led him to his way of violence and hatred? And how can we reach out in some way to those who are determined to follow in his footsteps?

God, how we need you.

Give and take - the key to good relationships

There is much in the news these days of the increasing regularity of marriage breakdown. One local nightclub even advertises "divorce parties", which I find a very sad indictment on our society. Marriage isn't always easy, and every marriage goes through its rough patches. Remarkably, three separate couples at Priory, my church, recently celebrated 60 years of married life, and another couple celebrated their golden wedding anniversary. 230 years between the four couples!

In my experience (a mere 33 years so far!), there are certain trigger points which can, if we don't be careful, set off arguments between Sue and I. One of those used to be when we were on a long car journey and Sue was navigating. For some reason we never quite managed to get on the same wavelength. Fortunately the advent of satellite navigation systems has solved that particular dilemma!

We were faced with another potentially difficult area this week. Sue and I spent the past week at our flat in Scarborough. We have had it for quite a few years now, and although we decorated throughout when we first bought the flat, parts are looking a bit shabby and ready for redecoration. We decided that our post-Easter break would be spent at the flat, and that we would redecorate the main bedroom. Wallpapering has been another of the areas where, over the years, we have had our share of arguments.

We had several discussions over the choice of wallpaper, and it took quite some time for us to eventually make a choice. Sue agreed with my idea to go for a wallpaper mural on one wall. We had never done this before, and putting it up was a whole new experience for us.

To add to our difficulties, Sue had some kind of virus during the week. I'm not really sure why wallpapering has, over the years, caused tension between us. When we get on with it and work together as a team, we get on ok. The real problem probably lies in our different approach the job. I tend to want to get on with things asap, whereas Sue (quite rightly) wants to take time to do the job properly. In the end I guess that we managed to complete the job with a bit of compromise on both sides.

Just before Jesus was arrested and taken for crucifixion, he prayed for his disciples. His prayer was that they might be in unity and love together. He had already told his disciples that their love for one another would be a sign to the world that they truly were his followers. One of the key elements of love is the willingness to compromise; or, to put it another way, being willing to give and take. Sue and I don't always get it right, but we managed it (about) this week, and the job was done. Even the mural looked ok!